what if the bumps around your nipples were actually braille and everyone had a different message like fortune cookies
Wait FOXNEWSOFFICIAL OMFG WOW.
(via real-life-merida)
spoiler alert: it’s cause his head’s in the game but his heart’s in the song
(Source: christophertraegers, via real-life-merida)
is masturbating while smoking weed called masturblazing
no its called highjacking
guys no it’s weedwhacking
no its called dissapointing ur mother
(via real-life-merida)
I was so fucking confused for like 3 minutes just looking at it like ti la couch me re do and then i realized
ti la couch
(Source: demidieux, via real-life-merida)
misha-let-me-touch-your-assbutt:
When your teacher is nice but can’t fucking teach
When your teacher is mean but teaches really good
When you’re teacher is nice and teaches really well, but the class is full of fucking twats
When the students are well behaved but the Teacher is still a fucking bitch
when your teacher keeps getting replaced because it’s defence against the dark arts
When you’re singing alone on a golf course
(Source: spazztastic-muffin, via real-life-merida)
(Source: ruthwilson, via real-life-merida)
For every note this post gets, I won’t cut for a day.
I’ll put every url that reblogged this into a jar. If I feel like cutting, I’ll randomly pull out any url from the jar, I won’t cut, but I’ll message you and thank you.
(via real-life-merida)
I took this picture cause I knew this story was tumblr worthy.
So I had been sitting in my big white van behind the lowell building, not going to class, and staring happily at a brick wall.
out of the corner of my eye, i notice a man coming up the alley, slow down a little past the car, but ultimately keep going.
the term ‘weirdo’ passed my mind, and I locked the doors even though any actual threat was minimal, and soon I was staring at the wall again.
Not less than 5 minutes later I heard a knocking at the passenger side window. I look over, and it’s the same weirdo who walked by the car before; Except now he looked particularly nervous and had his nose pressed against the glass.
I should mention that I never felt particularly frightened of this man. he was quite skinny, and seemed extremely skittish and fearful both when I saw him starting up the alley, and now, as he knocked.
Anyway, I rolled down the window slightly and asked “can I help you?” with one eyebrow raised and a general look of confusion.
he gestured at me with his chin, and said with an equally confused tone “you…eh…you…sex?”
We had a moment of silence.
Eyebrow still raised, and before I knew what was coming out of my mouth, I raised both my hands, shook my head and said “I’m wearing mittens”.
He immediately started shaking his head up and down as if he understood, and practically started sprinting away.
I lowered my hands after a minute and I….
what…
I can’t tell which is funnier: The fact that this strange man thought I was some sort of portable hooker, parking my van behind churches and waiting for patrons, or that my proof against being a hooker was the fact that I was wearing mittens.
this is one of the strangest interactions between two confused human beings i’ve ever heard of
(via real-life-merida)
do you ever just get up from your computer to walk aimlessly around your house only to sit back down in front of the computer again
I pointlessly open the fridge too.
sometimes i just stand in the middle of the living room and look lost.
Why am I in the bathroom
(Source: jackwildering, via real-life-merida)
(Source: wutu, via ode-tosleep)
